Have you ever liked someone so much...till you felt like you were going to die?

The pain of that person leaving you...burning over and over again through your heart.

The pain...of that person rejecting you.

You're not being loved.

I've realised that...when I tried to write a love story, I'm totally lost as to what to write.

I keep thinking..."What must the main character say to the person she likes?" or how they would proceed......

But i don't know what love is.

Some ppl can claim that they know what love is...just because they had tons and dozens of boyfriends and girlfriends. But I don't really care. They all look the same to me...

All lonely...helpless...and sad.

Were they so desperate as to throw themselves at whoever that would accept them?

And how....can all those ppl who have been hurt by the other party, actually be able to remain as friends with them?

This world is weird...

I used to hear calls for help. But when i closed my eyes and thought about it. It was me who was screaming away.

Why the pain?

I've realised...how people would actually be able to love me for who I am instead of my looks.

But it's too late...right...?

To become stronger, i threw myself away. You won't know the pain i've been through.

I've lost myself. I can't find myself anymore...

Just when i finally thought i did, fate crushes it like it meant nothing.

I can't go back to who i am.

Act-cute. Why are you being so fake?

I'm not being fake. This IS me. I have always been this way...

Liar. You just act cute to get everybody's attention.

That's not true. That's a lie.

Just because i look mature...doesn't mean that i can't be cute. It doesn't mean I can't have fun.

So why am I being so mature for?

Why...?

I wanna go back to being who i was...but that would mean that i would throw away all my courage. I would throw away all i've learnt.

I can't move forward...and I can't go back.

I'm tired. It's like...when you're Yuna...and yet you're trying to be Lenne.

I am me! I don't need to follow other ppl's instructions on how to live my life!

I'm sick...of being someone i am not.

I look at myself in the mirror and feel frustrated.

side parting....long hair....

I could imagine myself taking out a kunai and cutting off the lower half of my hair.

Maybe then...I would look more like myself again...?

If only....I could....

Be a better person.